Dance!

When God celebrates over us, He sings and dances in heaven. When we celebrate here on earth, we sometimes tap our feet, jump with joy, or wave our fists in the air. It's all the same, we are made to experience Joy and we are made to Sing, and we are made for Dancing.

From when I was healed of my self-rejection, and self-induced shame, I was freed to dance. And though it took a long time to come out of my shell, I had come to realise that God is pleased with my dancing. It's one thing to celebrate something as big as redemption, salvation, forgiveness, and everlasting love, by standing with one or two hands held up, and another thing altogether to do what we are made for, and that is dancing.

Just so you know. I have labored 3 hard years trying to learn dancing, much shorter than the years I tried to learn to clap to the beat or to sing in tune. I don't have what the world calls "musical talent" because I can't keep a beat, and I can't keep a tune. So what then, do I call dancing? It's mostly just moving the way your body demands to move when it is excited, full of joy and feeling the music. It doesn't have to have waves, steps, popping, specific styles and cultures, no. It doesn't have to please the physical eye. We aren't worshipping one another. If anyone is looking at you during worship, they're looking at the wrong place! No, dancing is just an extension to singing, and it is just what God wants to see in His people. You simply cannot stand in a pew and "celebrate" the Risen King! The second you get into it, your knee will surely hit the pew in front of you, and you will stop short in your celebration. If possible, find a nice quiet space, and just dance!

It doesn't have to be "hot", or "sassy", or anything.. simply put, I'm 100% sure that God has His goofy moments too, and when we go up to see Him, He will surely enjoy dancing with those of us who "cannot dance" in the way that the world expects to see, because our focus isn't on the world. It is on Him!

So I challenge you, brothers and sisters. Don't live up to the world's expectations. Don't judge yourself or reject yourself based on what you think is "appropriate". Think hard on how a child would act upon anticipating Daddy's return. Or simply, watch this video of a real baby waiting for Daddy, and doing a happy dance when he sees Daddy pull into the driveway.

Cuz worship is now. And worship is our audition for our dance in Heaven. So get with it =P And yes, it's thrice as satisfying to shake off the judgement and rejection, and dance than not.

REND the heavens 2015

Last night was the end of the REND Worship Conference 2015. And Eddie Ma came and delivered God’s message on what it means to be radical, and why we worship.

I’m still in awe of what has been said and what has been given to me. He came calling, just like Bob and Kimberley Johnson before him, and Philemon Choi before them. “Young men’s visions will fulfil old men’s dreams before they end.” he said. I believe him, because God gave them big dreams, and he gives us, this generation, glorious visions.

So was it a calling? Maybe. For me, it was a timely reminder of what Radical Christianity is about. Real Christianity. Lifestyle Christianity. However you call it. The spiritual warfront. “How can a few radical guys from the dark end of the world strike fear into the heart of the world? The answer is, we are not radical enough. If we responded to God with the same radicality, we would be fulfilling the end time prophecies now.” If we read in Revelations, Christians raise up and go to the ends of the earth, sharing about God fearlessly, with the truth of God’s promises in their eyes and their hearts. That is because they have asked to see and hear and know God’s promises fulfilled, and with that reality in their hearts, they can stand strong against all atrocities. Nothing can stand against our God, whom shall we fear if He is our King?

We are in the end times already. The war has already started. The enemy is gathering troops. If we see this as a war, we can clearly predict what is going to happen very soon. The world is already in chaos. It’s time, brothers and sisters. It’s time to pick up our cross and follow Him. It’s time to go out, soldiers of the Cross, and fulfil what we are called to do.

What are we called to do? Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and might. Love your neighbor as yourself. We have always been called to fight darkness with Love, and Love is the only way. What is a radical lover? Eddie Ma says a radical lover stops at nothing to love. I know you are radical, but are you radical in everything that you do? Are you a radical lover of God and of people? Are you radical enough? To die to the cross every time you do anything. Radical in your singing, radical in your dancing, radical in your tithing, radical in your loving. What would it look like if you were to sing as if you were to die for Jesus? What would it look like if you were to give as if you were to die for Jesus? What would it look like if you were to love as if you were to die for Jesus? Is that what you are doing now?

Raise up, my brothers and sisters. It’s time. It’s time to be radical again. The world won’t last, but His love will. And His will. So fix your eyes on Him, and not on this world. Fix your eyes on His promises fulfilled and not on the lies of the enemy. Fix your eyes on how to live radically as a Son and Daughter of God, and not as a son and daughter of this world.

Abide by heavenly rules, and not be blinded anymore. Choose. Choose to live for God, or to live without God. There is no middle ground anymore. If you hear, and understand, you need to make that choice now. The cost is great, living for Jesus. But the cost is even greater, living for the world. Which side will you be on? You have the will to choose, you have freewill. One thing that God made sure to give us. Even when the enemy makes every attempt to tell us that we don’t, we do. So, use it. Make your choice.

God is Always Talking

Lately, God has been teaching me a new way of praying for others and it's really cool. He urges me to not speak at all, until He shows me in my heart a vision and clarify it to where I can speak of it. And so, I proceeded to pray out of faith for those around me, and needless to say, He has delivered every single time, something that is strongly applicable through visions of beans, saplings, and even tissue. It's amazing how it works!

And just today, I've noticed a pattern. A lot of the time when I am praying, I would thank God for love and for words and state that I will open up for the Holy Spirit to tell me what to say, and even as I was saying these, the Holy Spirit has already placed an image in my heart, and it's amazing as I seek to unfold it. I realised that it is very true. People say that God is speaking all the time, and it's a matter of learning to listen. Yes indeed! He is so eager to speak that He runs ahead and starts speaking out of excitement and love for us, much like when your best friend hits on a topic of great interest to you, you'd shoot forward too.

And so continues my journey to learn more about visions and prayers...

Thanks for reading.

Fulfilment of prophecy

Remember that vision I had in March or so, where I was a sunflower standing near a goalpost, and that was God saying that I would grow to become like those spiritual giants in my fellowship? Well, it's happening right now. I was reflecting on some surprising findings about my growth this year, when I realised "Hey, didn't I have a vision about this before?"

And, I have a new friend to thank for that. I showed her my blog, and the first thing she responded was, "I'm sorry about your condition." I was.. pretty shocked, because as far as I knew, I've been pretty blessed and I've been opened about it. And so.. our conversation went like this:

Her: I'm sorry about your condition.
Me: Huh? What condition?
Her: You know.. the condition that you wrote about?
Me: I have a condition?!
Her: Autism.
Me: Ohhh.. yeah..

And I realised then, and much more these last few days, that.. in fact, I have lived like I had no condition at all. God had been so much of a blessing, and so beautifully awesome that I no longer felt disadvantaged, underprivileged, incomplete.. I felt the opposite. I felt chosen, loved, cherished, blessed upon blessed.. And not only that, I don't feel disabled.. I had completely forgotten it. Now that I think of it, I did have something.. and I did struggle so much with it, but God has been so faithful.. so faithful that I have forgotten how it was like. Can you imagine?

I have a friend who used to be an orphan, and just by looking at her, and the love that God pours down on her, you'd never know, because even she does not feel orphaned. He is Father to orphans, be it physical, emotional, psychological, or spiritual. He is Healer to the sick; again, physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual. There is nothing He can't complete. He completes us.

So, then seeing that I've come so far, that I've been so constantly fulfilled and filled with joy, that I don't even remember being broken and disadvantaged, I looked for other changes.. and there they were, I realised that people introduce newcomers in our fellowship to me, and I used to think it was just people trying to connect new people to regulars, but it's become more than that. People actually feel loved and welcomed when they spend their first evening with me. I didn't really think of that, I just wanted to love on people and make sure they get connected, because I know what it's like to be left out. For me, this is big because I used to be really bad with meeting new people.

Then my third discovery came nearly at the same time as this last one.. not only are new people coming my way, but other people have been coming to me for advice, comfort, encouragement, and I've slowly come to the realisation that I have taken a leap in Christ, that I have just by experiencing all the joy and love, and relationship with God, that I have grown so much. It's so encouraging, and effortless it seemed. Even though there were times when I had struggled, wrestled, brooded, cried, denied,.. it was all necessary for me to grow into who I am now. And the more I struggled, and the more I lower myself in the face of correction, and the more time I spend going over the basics, going back to God, weeping, crying, laughing, worshipping, soaking (sleeping!), and lately.. dancing.. the closer I get to who God is making me into.

What I realised these last few months is that most people reach a comfortable place in adulthood, and they stay there and defend their mountain. But if we just humble ourselves, and keep breaking habits, keep open minded, open hearted, open handed.. God can bless us so much more. Every time when He breaks our pride at our request, every time He builds us up from the pieces, He adds to us. He shows us a better way. He gives us life. Love. Peace. Joy. Humility. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. It is the beginning of a fulfilled life.

I've also started to do a media fast. I stopped watching anything that doesn't come with Jesus. That grew to no random youtube videos, no games, no time spent without God, and it's just been really awesome. And to top it off, God brought me to a new place in freedom. Freedom in worship with expression, aka dancing. I have little dancing background, but I can't hold still, I have to move when I worship.. I just have to! It's been super awesome! And that's mostly it.. oh yeah, and I also turned down a very good earthly offer that paid a competitive salary and share options in a very successful startup, in favour of an uncertain future with God. So I'm excited, I don't know what will come, but I intend to work for the glory of the Lord and noone else.

And finally, I'd like to wrap up with a photo of me dancing with angels at a Bethel Worship Night. =) Love you guys, and blessings in Jesus' Name!

Learning about Prayer

Hi family, it's been a while since I posted. As you would expect, I've been seeking God in prayer and had been seeking to encourage and bless my fellow Christians with prophetics. Especially, when God does seem to reveal quite a bit to me, I really wanted to peer into my friends', family's and acquaintances' lives in order to offer some insight. Though, as I journeyed towards learning more about the Prophetic Word, or dreams, visions, and knowledge that comes from God, I noticed that there are many around me who are much more prophetic than I am and yet, they have a code that they live by. They don't share prophetic knowledge as often as they receive it. So I went to learn more, and I found out a few basic rules that I need to follow:

1. You must check what you receive with the Bible.
2. You must be accountable to others. (1 Cor 14:32-33, God will correct/confirm you with other people)

And then a checklist:

All revelation must..
* be in line with Scripture
* be helpful to the receiver
* be consistent with God's heart
* produce fruit
* comes with peace in your heart, practical situation confirmation, and actual fulfilment of the received word.

Because if we randomly dish out prophetic word, there is a chance that i) it is not God's will, ii) it is not from God, iii) it is given at the wrong time and circumstance (where they are not meant to know, or will be hurt by it more than helped), and I find that final one a big issue because I have received word before that came with a sharp edge and it hurts and breaks and destroys rather than save and build up and encourage.

And if these weren't enough, I have also learnt that most prophetic word is meant for prayer. God reveals issues that are too big for you to handle, so that you can bring them back to Him and ask Him in prayer to handle them. It sounds very rhetoric, but it's true. God is going places and doing things, and He wants to take us with Him, to train us and to involve us, and that's why like a teacher or a parent, He shares bits and pieces that He wants to teach and trust you with, and let you handle those and see the change that takes place.

Now, other than the basic check list, I noticed that most prophetic people I know also have their own personal arrangement with God. It's a rule that God impresses upon them quite deeply, because God has a special purpose for each of them and wants to use them in a different way. So, I sought for a rule for the longest time.. maybe 6 months of serious, consistent prayer, and one day during worship, He gave me the rule together with a promise and an instant fulfilment/practical confirmation. His rule for me is this:

"If you want to learn how to pray and bless with prophetic insight, then you must do as I say. You must talk to noone and just pray to me, bring these issues to me, cry out to me, and trust me to do what I can do."

Then I argued, "That's cool, but aren't I supposed to be community and love and share with these people?"

He replied, "Yes. So if you really want to encourage these people, stick around, love on them, and wait till they open up and tell you themselves. Then, and only then, can you talk about the issue and what you know with them. Otherwise, just believe in me. Believe that prayer is the best thing you can do."

Instantly following my acceptance of this rule, God followed up with 2 detailed descriptions of what 2 of the people sitting near me were going through, and I knew then that God means business, because He's going to show me even more when I keep quiet and pray to Him alone.

The promise to be able to hear what He hears, see what He sees, become heartbroken over what breaks His heart, and pray just as His heart desires. That is my path right now, the Path of Prayer.

As a result, my prayer life has become richer, my heart compels to pray for more things, big worldly issues, or small day to day issues, because of His promise, and His constant fulfilment in letting me see these visions fulfilled.

Update: Loving the "Hell" out of People

Now with rejection being dealt with through Cleansing Stream, there has been several obvious byproducts or unexpected outcomes, and I'm just really excited about these times. Though I still suffer from insomnia, and it's just to the pressure that I get from my immediate situation, but God's love and God's joy forever prevails and so, I'm not suffering more than I should, if that makes any sense at all.

I only have a few assessments left before my semester is over, but the stress of wanting a bit of a summer before my summer job starts next week is what's giving me pressure at the moment. Mostly. Nevertheless, I know that life will become infinitely better as soon as I can drop these assignments, and just have a normal summer with undivided attention to 1 job, 1 family, 1 church and no part-time this or part-time that. It's always so frustrating when you're in a busy city that encourages you to be more busy than you really should be. A balance that is hard to maintain, but somehow I get by. 

One of the immediate outcomes of going through inner healing this time is that I can now deal with rejection with much more ease than I used to. I can be shouted down by people around me, and still not be too hurt by it. It's only been a week from the last session of Cleansing Stream, and I've already faced off with a few situations: i) a friend misunderstanding me and wanting to cut off all contact as a result, and ii) someone in my fellowship texting me a nightmare of criticism, and both of these occurrences have one thing in common: the person listening to the lies of the enemy. It's got rejection written all over it, and it's horrible, because even though I now know how to deal with rejection, this stuff is still hurting the other person that's involved. It's like the enemy saying "You think you've won, huh? Well, think again!" 

I'd have you know that both of these incidents have been quickly resolved, as quickly as I could manage, since it involves God directly in arranging for me to be able to speak with people who no longer want to speak with me, or no longer want to be nice. And it also involves bringing myself to a receiving state while knowing that I'll be receive a lot of hurt. But I now understand that these are indeed the works of the enemy, my friends being tormented and relationships being hurt, and people being tortured both by lies and by the horrible things that they are made to do after listening to those lies. It's not pretty, but if you're willing to take the damage, then give it God, and then take the people, and love the "hell" out of them, then there's really no fear, and there's simply just one way to deal with it, and that is through loving and knowing that it is not the person that is trying to hurt you, it's simply that when people are hurt, they tend to hurt others too. In short, "Hurt people hurt people." So once you restore the situation back to a healthy form, then the hurts stop, and the love continues.

I'm still learning, but I'm glad that everything's worked out so far. Once you realise that it's no about being right or wrong, and just about making peace and loving people, then you pretty much also realise that this is exactly what God wants for us to do, and that is to go out and find these hurt people, then to love the "hell" out of them. Cuz once your love becomes Christlike, or unconditional, "hell" or the enemy gets all iffy and flees the scene. In complete and total defeat.

Keep trying. Keep loving. Keep yourself in God's presence. 

Calling and Direction (part 2)

It was only a couple months ago, when Bob and Kimberly Johnson came to visit. The brother and sister-in-law of Bill Johnson of Bethel Church. They came to speak at the Young Adults fellowship that I belong to, and shared what God had put onto their hearts. Kimberly shared about the importance of finding God in your valleys, because it will carry you through the dark times ahead. That later inspired a vision where I had demanded for God to show me where He was when I was in my valley that week:

He not only showed me where He was, but where I was. Overlooking the valley, looking at all there is to be, sitting comfortably on His shoulders. That's Daddy for you.

They had also prayed over us and explained visions that they received for when they were "taken up to heaven to spend time with Daddy", and it was very similar to what I had experienced before, except I didn't realise that that was what it was, spending time in heaven. So that was encouraging, and needless to say, I did actually start seeing angels the week after, and here's one of the ones that joined me in worship:

But most importantly, it was Bob's sharing that revealed part of my calling to me, and answered some of the biggest questions that I've had for the better half of the year. Namely, i) why was God showering me with spiritual gifts, and ii) can I really make a difference in the world, especially with respect to human trafficking? Was that what I was supposed to be pursuing?

Bob did not come to speak to the masses. He came to speak to a selected few in a selected generation. I had heard before that the Kingdom is indeed near, and ours is a generation of harvesters, and what he came to Hong Kong to share was a confirmation to that. He started off asking if there were people in the room that seem to be showered with spiritual gifts. A ridiculous amount of it; dreams, visions, tongues, healing, all that heavenly stuff. Then he explained that it is indeed a taste of heaven, and it is meant to be there to give us encouragement, because God has a special purpose for us. We are His chosen ones, His favourite. The ones that He loves and favours so much that He's going to give us an important task. And that is to go to "hell", the darkest parts of the earth, and to minister there. He's showing us the reality of heaven and its wonders so that we can take it with us to those dark corners. This was some pretty encouraging and pretty heavy stuff. 

God's favourite, he explained, are people who respond to His love. God loves and He favours. He loves everyone the same, but He favours some more than others. And it's all to do with how we respond to that love. He gave an example of his own children. He has two from a previous marriage and two from his current marriage, and while he loves all four the same, the two from before reject his love, and thus are not able to enjoy and receive from it, and the other two choose to receive his love, and thus are able to enjoy and be blessed through that. And so, while we can all be God's children, there are some that are favoured, and those were the ones he (Bob) came to anoint for God's use.

Such a blessed couple, I am so glad to receive this, because it brought heads and tails to what I was experiencing, what I was alarmed about, and what I wasn't sure about my calling. So after this point, I kept on seeking God about what my calling is in more details, and in the weeks to come, through Justice Conference, and Cleansing Stream, and all the visions that led up to that point gave me more details and confidence into what God is really calling me to do. I'll write more about that in part 3. 

Exciting times, my friends. Exciting times. 

Season of healing

I have been attending Cleansing Stream the last 2 months, it's an inner healing ministry started by Pastor Chris Hayward. His calling is to have healthy inner healing churches in every church in the world, and twice a year for the last 10, there's been an inner healing course at my church. As a result, this season God called me to join, and I was healed of all my self-rejection. Complete restoration. Here's my testimony that I wrote to Hub and Spokes, the ministry hosting the event.

---

Hi Eufemia and team =)

My name is James. I am born with Klinefelter's Syndrome, a form of higher function Autism, and have struggled with it since I was young. Physically, I have less muscle mass than normal guys, emotionally I am different due to hormonal deficit, and socially, I trip all the time because I can't sense a lot of situations. However, since I don't carry the signature Autism look, people often expect me to be normal and when things get out of hand, as they always do, I end up having to explain all over again how I am, in fact, not normal. I struggle with this on a personal level too, often times than not, I curse myself and strap myself down to be not normal and don't expect great things out of me, despite knowing God's love, knowing that I'm God's favourite, and knowing that God has great plans for me. Subconsciously and consciously, I "knew" I will never be enough. There are great people, and I'm not that. I will always be 70% normal. And words to that effect.

I came to CSM knowing that God wants me here for this season, and that God wants to help me deal with this self-rejection. I didn't know how He will do it, nor did I expect Him to completely get rid of it. For someone who relies so much on God just to be alive and just to be able to do things, I was riddled with unbelief. Anointed with so much spiritual gifting, and yet not believing in His Words for me. I regularly receive discernment, words of knowledge, visions and dreams. I mistook these as God's compensation for my disability, but now I know it's nothing like that. 

The first night of the retreat, God gave me a vision. Very artistic, very awesome. First time ever dreaming in Japanese calligraphy art. I focused on giving the issue of self-rejection, of cursing my own growth and ability, to God. And He gave me a vision of 3 images. A tsunami, a glacier, and the Sun. The tsunami stands for all the blessings that He's going to give me. The glacier is a glacier because my God is an artist and glaciers are beautiful, but what's more is that, He said He will lift me up above others, and finally, He will draw me close to Him, the Sun represents His heart. As people continued to pray, I pull out my colour pencils obediently, as God had given me something that could be drawn. I didn't know how, but I have long known that God will guide my hand. I put pencil to paper, and soon after, I had the exact image I received in my head. It was powerful, and it rebuked and rejected everything that was in my curse, instead of being 70%, He will lift me higher than others, instead of cursed, He will flood me with blessings, and instead of not reaching spiritual heights, He will draw me closest to Him. It was encouraging, but I have seen visions before, and it still felt like nothing much will happen during retreat. The first night wasn't very eventful, and I was going to be tired the next day. I did not expect breakthrough.

The next day went quietly, I slept and dosed off as I had expected, and tried my best to retain what I listened to, and was not completely sure about it all, but felt a prompting to go up and share, and to encourage those that had served to help us throughout the retreat at the end. I had a picture after all. Somehow, it didn't turn out that way. Half way through sharing, God reminded me. He always keeps His promises. So I repeated what He said. He made me these promises, and He always keep His promises. And thus, the wonderful testimony and reminder that people seem to have given me glory for, but I was too excited to care about that, because my own breakthrough and revelation had only happened 2 seconds before everyone else's. 

Thank you so much, Hub & Spokes! Eufemia spoke about raising a generation of harvesters, and God had been speaking to me about harvesting this entire year, coaching, prepping, healing, encouraging, growing. This is the highlight so far, but I expect God to be carrying me up a glacier, and we are only one tenth of the way. Keep in touch, I will definitely be expecting really really awesome things in the future. I am available to make a video of my testimony or any other form that you'd like. Feel free to use this in any way. I will be interested in becoming an intercessor or anointer in the future. Please let me know how to apply for those.

Blessings,

James

PS. Here's the sketch. =)

Calling and Direction (Part 1)

It's funny seeing how God's plan for me line up in my life even before I became a Christian. His thoughts for me started even before Creation. It's a concept that's so hard to grasp, it's something that you'd repeat to yourself when you're down in a valley and try to believe, but when I look back now, I really do believe that He's got it all lined up for me. Beginning to end, past to present, and present to future. I would never have imagined to be given this calling at any point of my life.

Let's start at the beginning. I am born with a genetic disorder, Klinefelter Syndrome. I have a weaker body, a weaker mind, and some autistic symptoms. It's the struggle of my life. I can't read social cues, I can't lift and look buff, and I can't focus for more than 10 minutes! All my life, I've been trying to explain for myself, explain why I can't do this, or why I can't do that. I tried explaining for God too, how this would be my life's struggle and God would never give me anything else, that I would have the faith of an ox and never struggle with anything else in the world. How far wrong was I =P To top it off, my medicine throws me into a hormonal cyclone, where my physical body can't keep up and keeps on getting sick, and my emotions make a screaming banshee feel like a hummingbird, and my self-worth and self-acceptance comes down to accepting these as my permanent situation. That I would never be better. That I am made this way.

I got lucky in high school, I went to an international school where the curriculum was more balanced than the local one, so my grades in comparison were better, though I really didn't know how to study. My parents had put all their hopes and dreams into my education that they would punish me for not being excellent, for not focusing, for not doing my best in school. Was I really naughty? I did not know. But I ended up with average grades when compared to my peers in that school, but they were good enough to get me into any university here. Even when I failed at university, these old grades still gave me a chance at others.

I am gifted in language. I grew up speaking English, international school, international church. It's the one language I am literate in. But on paper, I received a D initially, and in comparison with first language English users, there are lots that I don't know. Nevertheless, it was the one thing I was good at in Hong Kong. The one thing that they acknowledged far beyond common sense: the natural international accent. They can't tell where I'm from, but they can tell, I've spoken this language in context. So after failing my attempts to get a Mathematics and Physics degree, and an Accounting degree, I've finally settled with English in second language teaching, primary school stream.

I had drifted away from God at that point, so the plan was simple: study for 4 years, and make up for the salary gap between what my peers were making and what I should have been making if I had progressed similarly. And it should be easy, being a native speaker of English and all. Funny thing, it was anything but easy, I'm in my third year now, and I am struggling with the workload, but somehow I made it past the last two years, I'm going to keep trying because if I fall now, I don't know how I'll get up again. But now, I also have God's assurance that I should be able to do all these things if I keep my life balanced. It would have been impossible if He hadn't done some healing over my condition and if I hadn't made the choice to be mediocre by rejecting modern medicine and turning to God to take care of the rest.

What God helped me change were my self-image, my perspective on my situation, and He took away quite a lot of the hurt that I had wrapped myself in to justify the things that I was going through. He had unravelled me in such a strong, yet gentle manner. I still have Klinefelter, I still struggle with all these, save for the medical complications, but I am now very open to God's transforming power. It'll still call for a lot of work, but I believe through humility, God will help me overcome all of these things. And now that I know my calling, I know He's going to do even more with me.

Justice Conference Asia 2015

Just been to a pretty big event over here. My church, The Vine Church Hong Kong, hosted this year's Justice Conference Asia, which happens to be my first JCA as well, and for 2 and a half days, speaker after speaker came and shared about three things: i) what is Justice in God's heart, ii) their work in different parts of Asia (and Australia), and about what we can do to help the cause, and there's been so much inspiration and information (overflow) that I probably can't piece together a good reflection until much later. However, it has already started causing changes in my views, my faith, as well as my calling, and I can't help getting excited about it.

In a nutshell, Justice is treating people the way that God intended them to be treated. And that basically means loving them as the beautiful individuals that God made them to be, and honouring them, and giving them a place in the world. It's not hard, because you don't have to go all the way across the world and love an abandoned child or a victim of sorts in order to do this, you just need to start at where you are and love any unloved, unwelcomed person you meet.  It's still super hard to do, but so long as you're willing, you can ask God to change your heart.

I've also been receiving a lot of direction from God about what He might be calling me to do in the near and distant future, and I'll be writing about that soon.

Healing

I started praying physical healing over people when I started to believe that it still happens. That was some time in August 2014, especially after a piece of glass disappeared from the inside of my foot after prayer. Though no healing actually occurred as I prayed, I truly believed that it would if God wills. So I kept it up, like much of my other spiritual gifts, I just leapt out in faith and sought to see where God would lead me. Ultimately, I wanted to be obedient, to learn, to love, and to learn to love.

I prayed consistently for various people including myself, as I am quite prone to injuries, and while flus, colds and headaches going away can easily be explained, I had always thanked God and kept faithful in trying and believing, and I guess it pays off in two ways: (i) God coming in and showing me how it's done, and (ii) I've gained courage and experience in this matter.

My first super obvious self heal occurred when my friend told me that tongues are very useful for healing, so just out of curiosity, I tried it over some bad persistent fungal growth just before I applied my ointment, and halfway in-between my wish and my doubts, the dry, rough skin disappeared from right under my fingers and were replaced with new, smooth and healthy skin. Wow! That was pretty amazing, I quickly continued praying for everything I could think of, but despite all the other injuries that I had, only the skin healed. Still, I was thrilled, because that had been such an annoying issue for such a long time!

So after this, I persisted in continuing to pray for people, and had double the confidence in praying healing over myself. I've heard testimonies that seem to say that you cannot do both healing on yourself and on others, but I don't know if that's Biblical, all I know is: We pray, God heals. So I kept trying for about 8 months, and then finally, during this healing service, Tom Jones came with his team to visit and they had words of knowledge for everyone. I went for prayer about this painful toothache that had the same symptoms of my previous bad tooth that resulted in a root canal surgery, and a fake tooth. The woman who I went to had a word about an abscess in the right cheek, and that was pretty close. So we prayed, and there wasn't immediate healing, but I know well enough that one healing doesn't affect another, so I turned around and prayed for the next guy, who had hurt his neck while working out that morning. After the first prayer, nothing happened, but I wanted to keep praying and just make it happen. So we went through 6 rounds, and slowly, he regained movement from his limited 10% to 80% movement restored. It was awesome! Now that is some good education and encouragement.

Later during the week, I was meeting up with a friend who had been a Christian back in high school, but had opted to be agnostic now in his adult life. Halfway through this meeting, he was flexing his knee a bit, and instinctively, I asked him to stretch out his legs. Surely as I suspected, he had one short and one long leg, just a small difference of a centimetre. Still, a difference is a difference, and it means that if God chooses to come in, He surely will. I prayed a short quiet prayer as I held his feet: "Dear Jesus, thank you for your love for _______. I just pray that you grow this leg back out. Right now. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you. Amen." And between the two "Thank you"s, his feet aligned! I pushed his shoes up towards his feet to see if it was just the shoes that had moved, but no, they were even now. I was so psych'd! He got up and walked around, but didn't feel much difference, but who knows just what God is going to do with this. I am beside myself, thrilled, to be used for healing. Just so thrilled.

Visions of Zimbabwe

Exciting times, my friends. God has been training me and growing me abundantly, and I can't remember a time where I'm not maxing out on my spiritual output for the past 6 months. This is really amazing. He's taught me to transfer visions onto paper, with colourful symbolic sketches, while drawing was never a talent, He always gives the ability to draw when it is necessary. Now I just enjoy sketching, and bring my sketchbook out with me everywhere. I've been spending a lot of time learning about Him, hearing from Him, and seeing from Him, not to mention being rebuked and growing further Christ-like. It's been hard work, but it's been amazing.

So anyway.. I think a couple months ago, while I was sharing my faith story with friend, she told me about Heidi Baker's work in Mozambique, and their School of Ministry there, and it's exciting for me to find out about that because they have similar ideals and beliefs as I do, especially on loving one person at a time, serving the ultra-poor and on fully relying on God for finances. I've been looking for direction in terms of ministry as well as a modern day ministry school. I don't like seminary, but I do very much like learning on the job, as well as learning practical skills like prayer, healing and worship. This is my first knowledge about Southern Africa.

Today, I took a nap at around 7pm, and had a very short dream that I woke abruptly from, and it goes like this: I was standing in a pool of water, and my shoes, my socks and the bottom of my shorts or trousers were wet, and my cheeky friend came along and asked if I was spending too much time in Muriel's Mine. I woke up wondering what that means, so I did some googling and found "Muriel Mine, Zimbabwe" on a map. And since the dream was about water, I went on maps to see if there were large bodies of water somewhere, and the closest body of water is a lake very far from the mine. I was a little confused, so I prayed for further hints on what it may be about. And I had a spark of inspiration, and deleted "Muriel Mine" from my search and searched "Zimbabwe flood" instead. And there it was, flood reports for Zimbabwe for both Feb 2014 and Jan 2015. And just out of curiosity, I zoomed out on the map that I was on, and found that Zimbabwe was the next door neighbor to Mozambique! Since I'm not a knowledgable person, before today I was only 60% sure that Zimbabwe was in Africa at all. It was even less with Mozambique two months ago, I had a sneaky suspicion that since it sounded a bit French that it may be a small country that I overlooked in Europe. *laughs*

So anyway, brothers and sisters, I would ask if you can pray for the flood situation in Zimbabwe and pray that people will be kept safe and will experience God's love, grace, and mercy through this ordeal.

//edit

After making this post, a brother in Christ shared a dream that he had on Feb 3. It was about a man that he knew from Zimbabwe being forced into slave labour, and about floods being planned by the government to displace people for more trafficking. I did a quick google search and found that this is true, and the last updates about floods on this website (http://floodlist.com/tag/zimbabwe) were made on Feb 3 and 4 this year.

So I'd like to invite you to pray with us as we pray for the injustice being done to the 3,300 families that were displaced last year, and however many more that will be and had been displaced over the years, and ask God to bring an end to modern day slavery and comfort and love to the people affected.

I declare the Beatitudes over them (Matt 5:3-12)

He said:

3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are those who mourn,
    for they will be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek,
    for they will inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
    for they will be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful,
    for they will be shown mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart,
    for they will see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers,
    for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Ripples of Love

Hi friends,

I recently received a word that helped me over some tough times. At first, it was just a prophetic exchange session (my very first!) where my friend and I had in turn been shown visions for one another, and it was really cool. I saw God filling her up unendingly and her serving many that needed healing and loving, and she saw me in God's ocean of love, where all my sorrows and pain are washed out. At that time, I thought it was really cool and didn't think too much of it.

Later, while I was struggling with carrying the hurt of others (something that I'm learning to let go to God, since it's not my duty to carry someone's pain and hurt, when Christ has already died for them and in turn set them free from all forms of captivity), I saw that I was focusing on myself too much, even when I was receiving that word, and I thought I was at the centre of the picture when actually I'm on the corner. A tiny stamp sized me on an A3 sheet of waves of His love. That love is so massive that there's no way for me to ever gain any hurt if even I swam through it to the other side, because it'll just keep coming. So while I was dwelling on this much love, and sharing about the joys of that discovery, God put it together in a form of a poem, and that's what I'm going to share with you today. =)

Let this also touch your hearts with beautiful praises for His majestic love for us!!

Ripples of Love

prophetic interpretation

Tremors.. Like ripples in my heart
Your gentle finger dipping upon the still lake
Leaving trails like a dragonfly
Feeding and filling my soul, o yearning soul

I am content as your hand dances along the surface
Waves after waves of love; exhilaration escapes my lips
You pause, then immerse yourself into the deep end
Flowing wonderfully and beautifully, Your love for me

It was you who stepped into my soul
An experienced diver with gentle ease
My soul drifting and parting with your slightest gesture
The drops. The drizzle. My soul sings delight.

I gaze up in my vision to see the eyes of a phoenix
So rich, so blue. Enticing..
Beckoning..
They said come.. Come, my true love
Dive deep into mine, as far as I am yours
Come in, come further, He said to me
Surrender your lake to my ocean of love.

As my soul drips into Him
I feel His brackish love stir invasively
Drenching, caressing, holding, cradling.
I opened my lips to utter His praises, but no sound came out
No word was worthy enough
The only thing left was to let go
I let go of the edges of my heart, my soul..
Letting the rest of the ocean flow
Rinse through me, overwhelm my small existence
His pure crystals flow through me, making me new.
New texture, new depth, new richness, new everything

I in Him and Him in me.
No borders. No break. No longer two.

At a distance, I see a lighthouse
He said, this is my Son
As the light shone on me, my crystals resonated and shone with equal brightness
The crystals around me lit up as well, and opened a path
Go there, my child, follow the path
For you are my salt and my light
---

This is what I saw in my mind when writing of these crystals and lights:

“You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.
14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

---Matthew 5:13-16

Be blessed!